The inevitability of change

Acceptance: the act of being at peace with “what is”, even if that is not what is originally envisioned.

On my last post, I touched on the inevitable uncertainty that coincides with our everyday lives. So many of us look at tomorrow as something we can predict. Whether it be our day jobs, plans with friends, or whatever else it may be – we are always trying to plan and predict what our tomorrow holds. Yes, to an extent, we can do this and this holds value. However, it is in the way that we find acceptance through this that creates the real impact on both our overall well being and state of mind.

Let’s say you are currently in a romantic relationship. If this is the case, you are most likely very familiar with the repetitive internal question, “do I see a future with this person?” This question is totally understandable to be asking yourself, but, it isn’t just a yes or no. It is a future question, meaning the answer can be easily changed at any point in time.

Finding clarity in “what is”

Maybe you start envisioning what it would be like to marry this person or how amazing it would be to travel the world together – love it. I am all over it. But the problem starts if we start focusing our thoughts too much on “what could be”, rather than on the more important, “what is.” When your mind is drawn to the future, the present may fall so distant you may not be able to see things for how they truly are. Your perceptions may become deceived by what you want to happen, making it difficult for you to see what is true in the present moment.

If we turn our attention to “what is,” we gain more clarity and acceptance for what is truly happening around us. It’s entirely okay to have thoughts about your future. But it’s about having these thoughts without attaching yourself to them. I know this isn’t the easiest. It is in our nature to create a self defined, idealized world for ourselves.

If we open our hearts to things not turning out exactly how we want them to be, then maybe change won’t feel so unexpected. Maybe change won’t feel like such a loss of self. Maybe, instead of resentment, we can find gratitude for change and life’s craziness.

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